my students make me smile:

their strategies for figuring out whether or not santa is real:

"if santa can know whether i am good or bad, he can know what i want for christmas. so this year, i'm not going to tell anyone what i really want. not even my mom and dad. then, if i still get it, santa's real."

"i'm gonna stay up all night. all night long and hide in the family room and watch."
"don't you think you'll fall asleep?"
"no. all night. then i'll know whether santa's real or not."

and these are the days the kids make me nervous...

(talking about world war II)

Teacher: ....and then he was executed at the end of the war. What does executed mean?
Student 1: it means killed
Student 2: with an axe!
Teacher: no, not with an axe anymore...
Student 3, interrupting: no, tied to a chair and shot!


yikes...what video games have these children been playing?

:-D

4th grader: Miss Teacher, how do you spell beavul?

me: what?

4th grader: beavul.

me: What, say it again?

4th grader: beavul. you know. beavul!

me: *puzzled look*

4th grader: you know, beavul! like will you beavul to play today?

me: OHH you mean BE ABLE?

4th grader: oh...i guess, yeah

and ireland is in WHAT state?

me: "where do you predict we'll be traveling next on our train tour of the northeast region?"



4th grader: "Ireland!"

if only 4th graders could vote in the real election...

today in 4th grade we were talking politics, specifically the issues the kids are concerned about and what they read about the candidates' takes on them. the kid logic was pretty fascinating.

almost equally as fascinating was me trying to explain things that i don't quite understand myself like the economy and health care to these kids. oh, not just explain them but explain them in kid friendly terms. probably not my most eloquent teacher moments...

i think my favorite parts of the discussion were the following moments:

SOMEONE's parents have been talking politics around the dinner table...
4th grader: "well, the iraq war is an important issue for me because we should leave iraq so we are still able to get our oil there and so they won't be mad for us trying to take them over. and i think that it was wrong of us to go there because george bush said there were weapons of mass destruction there and there weren't, we sent in spies and everything to look and they weren't there. and i think that george w. bush is just trying to finish what his father started..."

miss teacher.: "...you've brought up some issues that are very important to a lot of americans. tell me, where did you hear about those issues/how did you arrive at that conclusion?"

4th grader: "i just thought it up right now."


a future litmus voter:
miss teacher: are there any other issues you'd like to discuss or have questions about?

4th grader: "i heard obama is for this thing called abortion that means that women can kill their babies..."

miss teacher: "...ummm...ummmm" (looks to cooperating teacher for assistance...)

and in our spare time, we pulled an al gore...

me: my teacher's coming to watch me teach you tomorrow, so be on your best behavior!
4th grader: your teacher?
me: yup, my college teacher
4th grader: do you go to isu?
me: no, i go to wesleyan
4th grader: (beat)...wasn't the internet invented at wesleyan?

me: ...ummm...no. no, it wasn't.

love it.

this morning, i didn't just hit the snooze button a couple times, but i physically was out of bed, in the bathroom, about to get in the shower....and then i went back to my room, reset the alarm, and went back to sleep for 15 minutes. here's to reaching new levels of pathetic tiredness :-)

one of my students called me grandma today.

wow.

little 4th grade boy goes to the bathroom and is gone for about 10-15 minutes...beginning to wonder... he comes back and comes right up to me,
"miss teacher! miss teacher! i was in the bathroom and i went to the first soap and i pressed it and it fell off the wall! then i went to the second soap and i pressed it and it fell off the wall! so i went to the third soap and i pressed it and it fell off the wall! somebody pranked them! somebody pranked them!"

my immediate reaction: "did you wash your hands? did you wash your hands? get some hand sanitizer!"

and now we all know what every teacher's true priorities are...