Teaching Perseverance

I have a poster up in my room that says, "It's okay not to know.  It's NOT okay not to try."  This week, I felt like maybe I need to put that quote on the desk of half my students--maybe even all of them.  Or maybe wear it around my neck on a giant sandwich board.  Do you ever find yourself working with a group of students in math or reading or whatever, asking them to do a task, and finding yourself ready to shake them because all you're getting is blank, helpless stares?  Yup, that was me this week.  I promise to always, always be honest and never sugar coat on this blog, so here it goes:

I pretty much LOST IT some of my kids this week.

*sad face*

We started a math intervention block where we break off across the grade level into ability groups for a half hour of intervention/enrichment, and I work with one of the most struggling groups.  Some days it can be a real challenge.  Tuesday was one of those days.  We have been working on finding factors of a number for about two weeks (maybe even more), and as a warm up, I asked my group to create a "factor rainbow" for the number 30 on their white boards.  My group got the factor pair of 1 and 30 down on their boards...then stopped.  Many of them knew 2 would be a factor because 30 was even...but then just gave up.  If it wasn't on their multiplication charts, they couldn't figure it out.  I prompted them to think about some of the strategies we've used (arrays, skip counting, drawing groups...), but still...crickets.  

Finally, my patience ran out.  I let them know in a Viola Swamp-ish way that I was NOT impressed with their efforts.  I found myself saying over and over, "It's okay if you don't know the answer.  It's NOT okay if you sit there, waiting for the answer to appear in your head, and not doing anything about it."  I was so frustrated that they were just sitting there HELPLESS!

Yikes.  Luckily I had my PLC right after the math group and had a chance to regroup and reflect a bit before our regular math class.  I know in my heart that teaching grit and perseverance to my kids is as important as any of my content, so I decided to start my shared math lesson by revisiting our math class norms:

Specifically, that second one and the word "PERSEVERE."  I use this word all the time with my kids, but I hit it super hard that day.  We gave examples of what it means to give up when a math problem is tricky and what it means to persevere.  I stressed that persevering doesn't mean always arriving at the right answer--it means working hard and using every tool in your box without giving up.  It means asking questions and taking risks to TRY SOMETHING.  It means refusing to shut down and quit.  We modeled the body language that goes with giving up and the body language that goes with persevering.  

My regular math lesson called for a partner problem-solving activity--the perfect opportunity to practice perseverance (and of course our ongoing goal of teamwork!).  I challenged them to work with their partners and persevere through the activity.  I was so pumped to see an immediate difference in the kids and their approach to the concepts.  This just reiterated to me the importance of taking time to teach those things we expect.  If I expect my kids to be able to persevere, I need to teach them how to do that.  They may never have had a chance to develop that "grit" at home; maybe they have become so used to shutting down that it's their default when things get hard.  I am doing them a disservice if I allow that to continue...

...but I'm also doing them a disservice if I just get upset and frustrated when they do shut down.  Like I did this week.  I decided to make a new affirmation for my classroom:

Edit: I realized after the fact that this poster is spelled wrong!  Whoops, teacher brain!  Oh well, if my kids notice I will give them a prize for spotting the teacher's mistake... ;)

This is our new classroom motto as of this week.  It goes for me, too--when teaching gets tough, I WILL PERSEVERE!  I've been referring to it every day and continuing to talk about perseverance.  One morning during our classroom community time (aka the 5 minutes before we immediately switch to groups) I had the kids visualize running down the street towards a destination and being faced with a giant brick wall--I asked the kids, what would you do?  They answered, climb it, jump over it, break it down, bulldoze it over!  We talked about what that wall might be in math or reading and what tools they have to help them bust them down.  It was some powerful talk!

After talking about perseverance the last few days, I really can say I've noticed a difference in my class!  I've noticed a couple of the kids giving themselves some awesome positive self-talk, like on girl saying, "Okay, I'm not going to quit!" when we were working in a math group.  Other teachers on the team have also commented that the kids have been talking about perseverance and saying similar things.  YES!  Amazing what taking the time to step back, explain, model, and teach my expectations can accomplish.  If they can carry this one thing with them into next year and outside my classroom, the ability to persevere in the face of obstacles, I will be able to rest more easily at night.

How do you teach your kids to persevere?

A Case of the Mondays

Some teachers dread Fridays every week.  Not because it's the last day before the weekend (duh), but because of the crazy kiddos.  Well, I feel like it takes my kids until about Friday to get back into their routines every week!  I'm 99% sure that most of my little friends run wild all weekend long with zero bed times and zero structure.  Mondays are always a bit...trying.  It's not all them either--I'm definitely not my best on Mondays.

Today was especially frustrating.  I think I used up the majority of my patience during my oh so special PLC (team) meeting at 9:45am, thus making for an interesting rest of the day.  Working collaboratively as a PLC ideally means less work for everyone and better quality everything, but some days it just means arguing, differing opinions, and zero productivity.  Today was one of those days.  Ugh.  I'm still recovering.  Oh, and the clock in my classroom was broken.  Sweet.  Did I mention I don't wear a watch?  And keeping an eye on the clock is kinda important in the classroom?

After a frustrating day, I dragged myself to my tutoring job and scraped together any last shreds of patience I'd managed to cling onto.  Thankfully, my after school kiddo was ready to learn.  If he hadn't been, let's just say it wouldn't have been pretty.  I then dragged myself home.  After majorly failing at cross training all last week, my plan for the evening was to start the week off right by going for a swim around 8 or 8:30pm, giving the pool at the gym a chance to clear out a bit after the evening workout rush.  When I walked in my door, I knew that if I didn't IMMEDIATELY change into my swim suit, there was no way in hell that my planned swim was going to happen.  So I changed.  And sat around in a swim suit and yoga pants writing report card comments.  (While changing early was good for my motivation, it wasn't so good when I inevitably had to pee an hour later...oh the challenges of a one-piece suit...)

Several report card comments, way too many Pinterest pins, and one whiney phone vent to College Friend later, I dragged my crabby self to the gym and hopped into the *empty* pool.  Bliss.  I'm a terrible swimmer (in fact, I kind of panic in the water any time I swim a stroke other than breast stroke...so much for the years of swimming lessons as a child), but I love love love a nice easy swim workout.  While running will always be my true love, swimming is a close second.  Nothing like a bunch of methodical laps to clear my head.  I feel so. much. better now, and am DETERMINED to track down my positive attitude in time for school tomorrow.  Maybe I need to make Monday night swims a weekly thing...this could be good for my soul.

How was your Monday?


Late night workouts--love or hate?  

How many days until summer again?

Is anyone else just plain EXHAUSTED these days?  We have another month of school left, and I just may not make it!  My kids aren't really misbehaving or anything, but I'm just exhausted by a lot of the little things lately.  My current sources of exhaustion...

Is anyone else thinking seriously of changing their name because theirs is SO TIRED OUT from being called out one billion times a day?!?  "Miss Teacher!  Miss Teacher!  Miss Teacher!"  Seriously, kids, before you shout out my name, please for the love of god try to solve the problem yourself.  Because 9 times out of 10, when you shout out, "Miss Teacher!  I didn't get a handout!" it's right there at your desk.  EXHAUSTING.

Also, why is it that the copier is ALWAYS out of staples whenever I am running a million packets of things?  I was copying my literacy handout packets yesterday (Thursday = copy day...hooray...) plus a reading guide, a response journal, and an interact guide for our new social studies unit.  We are starting a Westward Expansion Interact that is completely outside of the social studies series, and I am having the students do a lot of cool simulations and responses.  But I like everything neatly stapled together...and there were no staples in the copier.  Cut to me stapeling about 100 different things together...EXHAUSTING.

Are the routines in anyone else's room UNRAVELING a bit?  Our Daily 3 (read more about it here) literacy block structure used to run like a well-oiled machine.  It's not BAD now or even falling apart...but some things need to be improved.  For example, when I take the "status of the class" before a rotation (call everyone's name so they can tell me what they're choosing for the rotation, and record it on my checklist), I am so sick of kids WHISPERING their choice.  I CANNOT HEAR YOU!  Seriously, I know these kids can speak up!  Come. on.  EXHAUSTING.

I am fully of the belief though that when it comes to management, I set the tone in the room.  More often than not when we have an off day it is because I am off, and I try to own that.  So today and yesterday I put a "hold" on guided reading and just focused on reteaching/practicing the Daily 3 routine.  We made a new chart of things to work on, reviewed it, and talked about things that went well/things to improve after every rotation.

Our regular Daily 3 anchor charts...

Things we really need to work on fixing in Daily 3...

This helps SO MUCH, not only in Daily 3 but in any area where the kids are struggling with routines.  It is the most important thing I learned from my first year teaching.  Things are never too bad to be fixed in the classroom--pausing learning and taking time to reteach is so beneficial in the long run.  It may be what gets us to June!

Since I am feeling just a bit burned out lately, I decided to do something fun and organize another cabinet.  :)  Okay, it was fun for me.  Soothing really.  Don't make fun.

My beautifully organized science and social studies cabinet!  Don't worry, I totally showed this off to multiple other teachers.  I am always grateful when people feign excitement over this type of thing for my benefit. ;)

Teachers, what is exhausting YOU these past few weeks??  

Dear Mr. Principal,

Mr. Principal.  Please, for the love of god, give us a break.

No, I'm serious.  Here's the thing.  We're all doing the best we can.  And while I know that you do know this in theory, it certainly doesn't feel like it these days.  Your list of demands and "requests" (aka demands coated in a frosting of "please," "thank you," "would you mind...," and "why don't you try...") needs to stop growing, or we are going to lost it.

Yes, I am preparing for the ISAT tests.  I am sucking the life out of my students and myself with every test prep packet, but I am following your directions.  I'm doing what you ask.  And while it's true that there will be no surprises on test day for my kids, there will also likely be no energy left.  And it still won't go back in time and force my kids' parents to read to them when they were little.  It still won't help my undiagnosed ADD kids with uncooperative parents keep their brains on topic through a 2 hour test.  It still won't help my emotionally distressed students with difficult home lives focus on something so meaningless.  But I promise, I'm doing my best.

Yes, I will have my kids ready for conferences.  It didn't help that you and others in the building decided that conferences day would be a great day to hold a school-wide reading event that involved every teacher preparing published pieces of their students' writing.  It wasn't fun staying late at school to laminate book covers and bind books.  And while the finished products are amazing, it was a lot of stress during a trying time.  Don't worry, I will still make time to rehearse with the students so they are ready to "lead" conferences as you've requested.  Don't worry, I will gather my "data" and be prepared to share it.  Don't worry.  It will all get done.  But know that I will need to take class time to get the students ready for conferences.  And that means less time for test prep.  And literacy.  And writing.  And everything else you'd like me to squeeze in the day.

Yes, I will have my report cards ready to go in a few weeks.  I know it's not you that chooses to make report cards due right before testing and right after conferences.  I understand that sometimes you are as powerless as I am.  But please listen when I say that I already know comments have to be specific and detailed; there is no need to remind us of that these coming weeks.

Yes, I am filling out RTI.  And even though I am wondering why the special services teachers are not helping me more with this, or why I am always the one setting up the meetings on these kids and not the specialists that see them daily for the interventions these meetings evaluate, but I smile and bite my lip and do it anyways because I care about the kids too much to wait for someone else to pick up the ball.  Oh and also, THANK YOU for asking me if I'm planning on meeting to finish the RTI form for my student who MOVED to a different school in district.  Sure.  Why not.  I'll take time to continue meeting about him even though he is no longer my student.  Add it to the list.

Oh, and Mr. Principal, THANK YOU for adding to all of the stress that you've already created by deciding to email the non-tenured teachers today to just let us know that you will be popping in for an unannounced observation in the next few weeks.  Of course, I would be happy to submit detailed lesson plans in every subject to you so you are able to choose a time to observe...Of course, I will be flexible and make sure every subject is stellar so that, since you have decided not to tell us the subject you are observing in advance, I feel confident in every area "just in case."  And after the observation, I will be happy to smile and nod as we discuss the 100 other "suggestions" of things I could be making time for in my day.  When in reality, we barely have time to teach period with all of the other hoops we are all jumping through.

Mr. Principal, I know you support me.  I know you care about me.  But please, please, please give us all a break.  Acknowledge that we are doing our best.  And please don't ask us for anything else right now.  Have mercy.

Sincerely,
Miss Teacher

Keep Moving

Today I had a fabulous coffee date with Miss R, and as usual we relished the opportunity to share our teaching celebrations and frustrations with someone who is experiencing the exact same things.  One thing that we discussed this afternoon was the pressure we often put on ourselves when it comes to teaching.  Our first year, we both struggled with having incredibly ambitious aims and visions, and having to reconcile those goals with the fact that, as a first year teacher, you CANNOT DO IT ALL!!  We couldn't be the teachers we had always dreamed we would be, at least not yet, because we were barely staying above water.  This year, we have improved, but I at least still feel like there is so much more I could be doing, should be doing, WISH I were able to do.

The thing is, this pressure comes from how much we LOVE OUR STUDENTS and how dedicated we are to them and their education.  But still, we are only second year teachers, and we cannot do it all.  Every year we will learn a little more and be able to take on a little more.  And our students will benefit from it.  The important thing is to set small goals and truly take time to appreciate how far we have come.  Anyways, tonight I remembered a quote that I felt was appropriate for this conversation.  It's from the book The Runner's Guide to the Meaning of Life by Boston Marathon Winner Amby Burfoot, and while about running, I honestly think it can be applied to any area of life.

I have learned that there is no failure in running, or in life, 

as long as you keep moving.

It's not about speed.

And gold medals.

It's about refusing to be stopped.

You might find that one particular direction proves difficult,

but there are many points on a compass.

Infinite, in fact.

As long as you keep searching, you'll find your winning way.

That's what I will be remembering this week: It's about keeping moving, keeping trying, keeping teaching, keeping coming back and not giving up on the kids.  It's about refusing to be stopped.  :)

yikes

When Dan Brown of The Great Expectations School came and spoke to my senior seminar class last year about his teaching experience in the Bronx, he told us how there were weeks when he was literally just coming into school and teaching for that one child. He would tell himself, if I can just help one child... On the days when the staff and students made him crazy, he'd think of that one child who was paying attention and learning and listening. When Dan Brown told us that last year in CLA 101, we all kind of laughed. One child? please.

Now, after leaving the comfortable walls of CLA and entering the actual classroom, I'm finding myself wondering how I will possibly make it through the year. And I'm finding myself saying the very same thing: "If it weren't for this student, I swear I wouldn't make it..." I know, I'm probably being dramatic. Of course I will make it though the year. But it seems like all I can think about is how I'm not doing a good enough job, how there are so many kids I'm already not helping enough, and how they're going to wear me down before I have a chance to make an impact.

But tomorrow I will still go to school, and if that handful of kids gets me down, at lest I can look to "that one student" and his immaculate desk and organized folders and think, 'thank goodness i have ONE who knows what to do at school!'

Wow, i really need some sleep. I got to school this morning at 5:45am and left at 6:45pm. Tomorrow I think I'm going to sleep in until 5:15...I know, I'm a rebel. :/ Here's hoping tomorrow is a good day.

another frustration and a little crying at my desk

Today afterschool (after a wonderful surprise end-of-the-day visit from my good friend's mom who works in the district!! ), I met with my literacy coach to determine a plan of action for tackling my whirlwind of literacy that will take place next week (by next week, I mean the two days I will actually be with my kids...). Thankfully, she is going to come into my room and lead two of my guided reading groups. Phew. Thanks, Mrs. J! However, we still are determining what I need to start doing in the future for guided reading.

Mrs. J conferenced with the other literacy coaches today, and they decided that me, my other novice teacher buddy Miss R (not to be confused with the other Miss R from IWU!), and my team partner, Ms. R (too many Rs...), who are all confused about literacy this year, will be doing Daily 5. Or make that Daily 3. (I'm not sure which 2 they ditched, but I'll find out I guess). However, we'll be doing Daily 3 with a twist: instead of just reading to self, etc. all week, students will first be required to complete reading assignments in their leveled readers before and after our guided reading group sessions. After working with the reader, they will move onto the Daily 3. I am not exactly sure what I'm going to be doing for this since I am not entirely familiar with the ins and outs of the Daily 5 (just that it seems to be very "in" right now...), but I'm assuming that we are all going to work this out together.

I feel like Daily 5 is something I can handle (or will be able to handle with some help). It will be a lot of work to figure out at first, and tough to train my chatty bunch of kiddos, but at least someone is FINALLY giving me some direction on what to do here. Thank goodenss.

Anyways, that was a big long tangent. Back to the crying. Well, after this meeting, I began working on some plans and I decided I should probably look over the Literacy Test I am giving tomorrow. (I know, I'm a bad teacher. I should have looked at it at the BEGINNING of the week, not Thursday night! *hangs head in shame*) Well, imagine my surprise when, after my careful adhearence to the teacher edition lesson guides, my focus on teaching all of the "tested skills," and my emphasis on the week's target reading strategy, the extended essay question on the reading test is entirely based on a skill that appeared NOWHERE in the story or target skills. what the heck? I would have taught my students the skill if the text had asked me to! Why are they testing my kids on it???

Well, I called my team partner Ms. R and left her a very freaked out voicemail, then proceeded to cry for about 15 minutes. Thank goodness she called me back (after I had stopped being a baby) and calmed me down. Tomorrow's test will be fine, and I will talk them through that portion. And, as I was reminded today, I am the teacher now. If I don't like a part of a test, I can throw it out this week. Or, I can even do it with them.

I am the teacher. When did that happen?

Yikes.

frustrations

It's 5:33 am as I'm writing this, and I've already been up, showered, and dressed. As I wait for my bowl of oatmeal to cool, let me just share a couple of the frustrations I'm experiencing...

1. Math. I have been told to go in order, lesson by lesson, through the chapter. Thus, I am going in order. My frustration: My team who gives me a quiz to give to my class (oh common assessments...) this week, when at least a third of it isn't covered in the book until next week. Umm, huh?

2. Guided Reading. Just when I thought what I was doing with the kids this week while I was with my groups was working, I was informed yesterday by one of my teammates that she has been hearing that the principal doesn't want the kids working on individual seat packets during that time. I guess I should actually ask the principal, because it seems like I get very different opinions from everyone I talk to, including the literacy coaches...

3. ISAT preparation and pressure. Already. Let me summarize my emotions in the following "note" to my team:

Dear team,

Please do not mention ISATS to me for at least a month. Currently, I am not even going one day at a time, but one hour. I'm not sure what I'm doing after lunch today. Right now, I'm not sure I'm even teaching right, since no one is watching and letting me know. I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. If I single handedly bring down our grade's scores, I apologize. But please, continue discussing how we should probably be giving a math extended response every week only if you want to see me have a heart attack.

Love,
Miss Teacher

Anyways...I'm hoping to leave for school by 6 to begin tackling my pile of worry and things to do...